News
About Natalia
Games
Our Team
Articles
Gallery
Chess Links
Play Chess
Pogonina's Chess Shop
Advertise
Contact Us

Highlights

 Follow Natalia on Twitter:

http://www.pogonina.com/images//nat%20twit.jpg

 
Please help Natalia promote chess by making a donation:



 

Link to Pogonina.com

Play chess at ChessOk

365Chess.com Biggest Online Chess Games Database





Check qyto.jp for Japanese bitcoin casinos.

Here you can find Swedish sites without license, Spelkonto utan licens.

Find new casinos at the brand new Online Casinos XYZ site with reviews and ratings of the best gambling sites for UK players.

Play the popular King Kong Cash slot machine at Slot Strike, the new slot site for UK players.

Grab the chance to win big with a high RTP on the goonies slot progressive jackpot.

Goodluckmate.com - made an easier way to find Skrill casinos

Nettikasinot.media lists the best online casinos for Finnish gamblers. For more information visit: https://www.nettikasinot.media/suomalaiset-kasinot/  

Sweden is now a regulated market, which means that as a player you can only play at casinos with a license. See all regulated
casinos in Sweden by Mr casinova.

To find the best casino in Norway take look at
norske casino at CasinoPiloten.

Find the best Norwegian casinobonus at NyeCasinoNorge.org.

Get exclusive access to a
huge range of free spins & no deposit casino offers with Spin Bonus.

Try the exhilarating new 20p Roulette game.
Play it online at thecasinodb and find casinos to play for real money.

Get the best casino bonus information with Casino Gorilla.

Chess games at Gametop

CasinoAdvisers.com For you that want to find online casino strategies, guides and a good casino bonus!

 
   More...


Polls
What's your FIDE rating?

What should Natalia do to make Pogonina.com more interesting for you?

Who is your favorite active top player?

Poker or chess: what do you like more?

What's the largest monetary chess prize you ever won?

How much time per day do you spend on chess-related activities?

Do you have a special chess mascot (pen, badge, toy, etc.)?

Which time control do you prefer for over-the-board tournaments?

The strongest women's chess team in the world is

What is the strongest national chess team in the world?

Will Magnus Carlsen's rating reach FIDE 2900?

Do you think you can become a GM?

More Vladimir Kramnik Facts (Humor)

User Rating: / 14
PoorBest 
Written by Administrator   
Friday, 13 May 2011
Image

A few more Kramnik jokes: 

1)      Joanne Rowling is working on a sequel to "Harry Potter" called "Vladimir Kramnik".

2)      Vladimir's Kramnik's glasses is an artefact that increases one's FIDE raing by 500 points.

3)      One of the journalists asked Kramnik if he will start playing weaker without his glasses (see #2). Kramnik replied calmly: "What will happen if you subtract a constant from infinity?".

4)      While Kramnik's classmates were busy proving the Pythagorean theorem, little Vova proved that chess is a draw. 

5)      Vladimir Kramnik is not interested in all the chess positions, but all chess positions are interested in Vladimir Kramnik.

6)      Candid Camera asked a cute blonde to approach Kramnik, ask for knight odds, while being secretly assisted by Rybka. Kramnik, being a true gentleman, decided not to win and made a draw.

7)      Kramnik finds poker dull as his starting hand is always two kings.

8)      Yet another eminent grandmaster has been delivered to the asylum. He claimed he can beat Kramnik.

9)      Vladimir Kramnik doesn't wait for his opponents to make a move. Instead, he takes a walk and sends them the move using telekinesis when necessary.

10)   There is just one player whom Vladimir Kramnik agrees to draw on move one - Peter Leko.

11)   When Kramnik is playing in tournaments, book-makers don't offer odds for the winner.

12)   In 1990 Kramnik was surprised to learn that the Berlin Wall has fallen, and promised he will "fix it soon".

13)   After all, Botvinnik did create an artificial intelligence that plays chess. His name is Vladimir Kramnik.

14)   Some openings are called after eminent masters. Chess is sometimes called "the game of Kramnik".

15)   Vladimir Kramnik uses chess engines only to find out why annotators keep making mistakes when analyzing his games.

16)   The Drawmaster character of the ChessMaster series is a pitiful attempt to imitate Kramnik's play.

17)   Few people know that Deep Blue self-destructed after losing a chess match to Kramnik's tennis racket.

18)   One day Kramnik was invited to the world chess puzzle solving contest. After he handed in answers to all the FIDE albums ahead of time, he doesn't visit these events anymore.

19)   The statement "e4 is winning, d6 doesn't lose" is not against the laws of logic since it works only for Vladimir Kramnik. 

20)   The aliens who visited Ilyumzhinov have captured all the other planets of the Universe after defeating their best chess players. Unfortunately for them, Kirsan had Kramnik's phone number...

21)   Kramnik solved checkers while being in the maternity home.

22)   Kramnik says his wife plays chess on amateur level. Indeed, she still enjoys beating Rybka over and over again.

23)   Kramnik was named the best painter of all times since no one can match his drawing technique.

24)   Few people know that the Pepsi machine from the famous commercial that delivered a knock-out punch to Kasparov was just Kramnik wearing a special uniform.

25)   Kasparov, Karpov and Fischer all failed to make it past round 1 of the "Who wants to be a millionaire" show since the question was "Who is the greatest chess player ever?" and the options - a) Kasparov b) Karpov c) Fischer d) Kramnik

Bookmark and Share




Comments (2)
1. Written by . on 10:33 17 2011 .
 
 
, !
 
2. Written by Silencioso on 19:01 07 2013 .
 
 
:grin
 

Write Comment
Name:
E-mail
Homepage
Title:
BBCode:Web AddressEmail AddressBold TextItalic TextUnderlined TextQuoteCodeOpen ListList ItemClose List
Comment:



Code:* Code

Last Updated ( Friday, 13 May 2011 )
 
< Prev   Next >