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Does Anyone Have a Cure for Anger Problems?

User Rating: / 12
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Written by Administrator   
Thursday, 04 July 2013
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by GM Danny Gormally


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I played a game a couple of days ago where I lost from a rook up.

At the end of the game I completely lost my rag and starting screaming, which was quite embarrassing in hindsight. Really I was angry at myself. Other players in the tournament (including my opponent) saw this meltdown and must have thought "what a nutter".

Increasingly I'm suffering from poor emotional control. You'd think I'd get calmer as I get older but at times I even feel I'm tettering on the brink of madness.

The problem is as I get older I feel increasingly under pressure to do well, and get distressed when I  don't do as well as I think I should. I'm 37 now and chess is the only thing I have and the only thing that I'm any good at. That creates an awful lot of pressure.

I've been stuck around "high 2400" - "low 2500" for some time now. I feel that I'm at least potentially better than that but I'm not proving it. The four tournaments I have coming up over the remainder of the summer (Scotland Champs, Ghent, British Champs, Vienna)  will go a long way to answering my question about whether I can find any improvement.

Looking on the bright side, I've blown off the cobwebs now with that event (the Big Slick in London) so I've certainly not got any excuses for finding my best form. But is my best form good enough? Increasingly I'm beginning to doubt that it is.

Not achieving what you want to in life, continually being frustrated, can lead to anger and resentment. Bitterness. It certainly has in my case.

It's not just chess that is making me angry though, I'm losing my rag at silly little things and feel I need to get some professional help if it's not to get any worse. It can't be good on the heart either to  be getting into a state of rage all the time. I must be in heart attack city right now.

GM Daniel Gormally is open for chess lessons. You can contact him using this This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it

Other posts by GM Danny Gormally:

The Depth of Chess
Fundraising in chess
Nurturing a Chess Prodigy
The Sad Case of Borislav Ivanov
4NCL Impressions: no country for old men - Part II
4NCL Impressions: no country for old men
One move, one line - Part II
One move, one line
Candidates Final Review & Preview of Upcoming World Championship Match
Would Carlsen have beaten Capablanca?

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Comments (3)
1. Written by Ishan Chattopadhyaya on 09:49 04 2013 .
 
 
In some ways, I can very well relate to the feeling. The way I deal with this is to never doubt myself and stop taking these challenges as seriously. If I believe I am good, and if I cannot overcome such mistakes, it then it surely must be a temporary thing.. since, "form is temporary, class is permanent". Hope it helps and hope you rise to 2600+ at least.
 
2. Written by This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it on 23:11 11 2013 .
 
 
Well I don't have a Cure for anger issues, It sounds to me you want to go up in rating and experience less anger.  
 
Well First of all, anger is natural. You have to let the anger out a bit, but not let it control you. Ohh I know it's hard to find a good way to stop the anger from coming on. But there are a few ways you can help yourself, all depends on the kind of person you are. are you more of an arts type, do you love traveling, maybe you like stare gazing. Well by spending some time on those things, you take your mind off the stress and express yourself. I Play violin, Irish tin whistle, harmonica, I love astronomy and travel, physics, ect. So by taking some time out of my day when im stressed and playing some violin and letting my emotions control the music and let everything out, or by looking all the amazing things we have found in the universe, or just by listening to some peaceful, or more uplifting music, The stress melts a bit. (If you ever need some amazing classical music, uplifting or relaxing, i'm the guy to talk to!) So just little hobbies and doing some things you love without restricting yourself, you take your mind off the stress. Maybe you like nature, live in a small town, near a lake, Go walking while listening to music! Let your thoughts go free while doing that. Ect ect 
 
as for chess improvement, You said you are starting to doubt yourself. That is already the wrong direction! You need the right mindset. I mean look at me, I started playing chess 7 months ago, I'm almost 2000 rated and have been told a few of my games were about 2200 quality. Why is that? Because I tell myself I can, I have confidence in myself. I said to everyone when I started playing that my goal was 2000 by the end of my first year, everyone told me that I couldn't unless I spent 7 hours a day training for 6 years, and 7 months later Here I am. You have to train, But you have to have fun doing it. Maybe refresh your chess interests, maybe things have gotten a bit stale? maybe try longer games, or if you like blitz but never really did it much, give it a shot for a while! play some chess engines set to a few hundred points higher then you are. Fritz 11 is pretty accurate, maybe you should get that, play it on tournament mode and try to set a rating goal on there. just any little thing to help boost your moral a bit. There are tons of things you can do, But if you ever need anyone to talk to, feel free to send me an email at This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it friend :)
 
3. Written by This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it on 02:15 17 2015 .
 
 
90486
His name is Sungha Jung. He was probably around 11 or 12 years old in this video. He started playing the guitar in early 2006 at the age of 9 and now plays all around the world, which led to a movie role, and is quite popular on Youtube with more than 1 million subscribers and over 600 million video views. Hes inspired a LOT of people to play the guitar. 
lebron 13
 

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